A conversation I’d like to have with my boss this week:
Me: Listen, I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it in this week
Boss: Oh, no? What’s the problem?
Me: Well, I think I’ve caught a vacation.
Boss: I’m sorry, come again?
Me: Well, my mom’s got this week off from work, she’s going to be spending it relaxing mostly. I think she gave it to me. She seemed pretty contagious.
For some reason, I don’t think that will fly.